How to Help
Do's and Don'ts
- Listen and be supportive.
- Express your concern for the person's welfare.
- Try to generate potential options or solutions without pressure.
- Encourage help-seeking behaviors, such as talking to others, or using available campus or community resources.
- Call Counseling Services at (973) 290-4175 to seek advice from a professional Counselor for your friend or for yourself in supporting your friend.
- Get immediate help if you think the person may harm themselves or another. Call (973) 540-0100, the 24-hour hotline at Morristown Medical Center, or 911 for the police and ambulance if you feel the person is at risk of hurting themselves or someone else.
- Ignore the problem and hope it will go away.
- Judge, preach, or pressure.
- Become a person's only support system.
- Keep a confidence if you feel you are in over your head as a helper, or assess the person as dangerous to self or others.
We understand how exciting, yet difficult, it is for you to let your child experience independent living for the first time. They will make many decisions in their years at CSE, and we all hope they make the best ones possible.
If you feel your child is struggling emotionally, with their decision-making abilities, their stress level, their relationships, or with family circumstances, please feel free to let the Counselor know by calling (973) 290-4175 and speaking with the Counselor. The more information the Counselor has in working with a student the more assistance the Counselor can provide.
If your child is 18 years of age or older, they are legally considered an adult and is protected by confidentiality. The Counselor may not acknowledge that they seek these services without their written permission.
The Counselor also may not force their to seek psychological assistance unless they are in danger of harming themselves, another, or property, or is mandated for a serious violation of college policy. In these circumstances, Counseling Services initiates assisting the student.
Common Reasons to Refer a Student to Counseling Service
Suicidal or homicidal thoughts or threats – call the Counselor at (973) 290-4175 or 911 immediately!
We would like to encourage you to refer students who are struggling with multiple stresses and personal issues to Counseling Services. The Counselor offers confidential, individual counseling sessions to students free of charge. The Counselor frequently consults with faculty, staff, and students about students they are concerned about.
If you are concerned about any of the students you interact with, whom you feel require additional attention beyond what you are able or trained to provide, you may wish to refer them to the Counselor. As licensed mental health professionals, we are most grateful for your confidence in Counseling Services as a referral source in assisting students. The Counselor views the referral process as one of mutual concern for the individual. Some of the most common reasons to refer a student to a Counselor are as follows:
- Abrupt decline in academic performance
- Anxiety/panic attacks
- Conflicts/Difficulties in relationships
- Decline in personal grooming/hygiene
- Difficulty adjusting to college
- Difficulty in becoming independent
- Engaging in self-injurious or high-risk behaviors
- Excessive class or exam absences
- Expresses desire for self-improvement
- Frequent crying
- Inability to complete assignments/live up to potential
- Inability to concentrate in class
- Inability to manage emotions (anger, frustration, etc.)
- Inappropriate classroom or social behavior
- Indecision about future goals or plans
- Loss of relationship – break-up, death, divorce
- Low self-esteem
- Poor judgment or decision-making abilities
- Reports of failure to use or misuse use of prescribed psychiatric medications or other drugs or supplements
- Sleep problems
- Social isolation/withdrawal
- Student's self-disclosure of a personal problem
- Suspicion of an eating disorder
- Suspicion of substance abuse
- Suspicion of victim of abuse
- Writing samples of concern
- Unstable family dynamics
The College has a centralized way of bringing individuals of concern to CSE college officials' attention through the Advocate system called CSE CARE. You may report an individual of concern to our Student Consult Team, which is a behavioral intervention team formulated by campuses around the nation after the VA Tech tragedy.
How to refer when speaking with the student:
- Please give students positive reasons for your referral. Try to point out the benefits of attending counseling and working toward behavior change or self-improvement. This will minimize the possible stigma associated with help-seeking behavior. If the environment permits, please offer the use of your telephone to make their first appointment by calling 973-290-4175. You may also offer to walk them over to Founders Hall, Ground floor, where Counseling Services is located.
- We recommend that rather than referring a person to Counseling Services or to a therapist in general, it is helpful to refer to the Counselor by name. In this manner, the Counselor is personalized and not threatening unknown entities.
- Once a student has made an appointment, you may suggest that they let you know how things worked out. In this way, you demonstrate your continued concern for their welfare. If students wish, they may reveal the contents of a counseling session. The Counselor is bound by confidentiality and may not reveal whether or not someone has sought the services at any time, without their written permission to do so.
- Due to very high demand for on-campus counseling services, the Counselor is sometimes unable to accommodate all student cases ourselves. The Counselor triages cases on an individual basis and refer some students to off-campus services. Please do not do this yourselves. The Counselor will want to meet and assess students, and become aware of our students' concerns in order to recommend appropriate resources and to follow-up with their care appropriately.
Counseling Services is here to promote student development and to assist you in doing so. If you have difficulty with a student or have concerns for a student who will not seek counseling, please let the Counselor know. There may be other ways to reach out to the student.
Counseling Services has many off-campus referrals available. The Counselor is also available for crisis intervention if a student's safety, the safety of others, or property is in danger.
Please do not hesitate to call the Counselor for assistance at x4175.
If this is a psychological emergency, call the 24-hour crisis hotline at Morristown Medical Center at (973) 540-0100, or call the police at 911.